I’m the villain!

Yes! I know, I’m Georgia’s father and I am the villain in this story. I’ve tried for months now to apologize. She just doesn’t seem to be getting my letters, phone messages… hell I even bought a carrier pigeon. How someone smuggled that in here, trust me, you don’t want to know. Also you don’t want to be that guys cellmate, because he cannot control his anus.

I realize that I have never been there for her and when I was, it would have been better if I wasn’t there at all. I’m not trying to make you feel sorry for me, which would probably help get Georgia to actually speak to me. You might feel a little sorry for me by the end of this, but I have to warn you that I am manipulative businessman and I only think for myself. Honestly I could convince you to buy your own shit. That’s just how I was raised and I don’t know anything other than that. I’ve been doing this “group counseling” session and it has made me realize that I am a terrible person. Georgia’s mom used to tell me that I had a good soul, and I used to laugh. But hopefully whatever this is that I am writing will eventually end up being read by Georgia. I’m turning over a new leaf because well I have a LOT of time on my hands. 

Where do I begin? I mean I have time, nothing but time quite honestly, you know this whole locked up thing. I’ve been reevaluating my life. I thought I was invincible and didn’t give a shit about anyone else, especially my daughter. To be honest it was because she reminded me so much of her mom that it broke my heart looking at her. That woman was my soulmate, the day I lost her was the day I lost myself. My life turned to darkness that day.  I thought that the day was the day your mom told me she was pregnant was the darkest day but I was wrong. That day my did change my life forever but I eventually found out what true bliss was because I was with her. In that moment I didn’t think the change would ever be a good thing. I was a young(ish) man on his way to global success. I was predestined billionaire. I offered to pay for the procedure to get rid of you but your mother wanted to keep you. And she was stubborn, you get that from her. She’ll probably haunt me for that.  So I thought she just wanted to keep you to get my money. She stopped talking to me for a year. I wasn’t even there when she gave birth. I bet you didn’t know that part of the story. She was the strongest person I’ve ever met. She didn’t need me but I needed her. I still do. Part of me  died in that time apart and when we got back together I never wanted to let her go. Then the rest died when she was taken from us. 

Yes,  I realize that I am a grown-ass man but heartbreak like that isn’t something that heals quickly. I lost my soul. I know pot and kettle situation. I’ve broken many hearts over the years. I’ve married more women than I can keep track of. I’ve done incredibly selfish and dangerous things. I know that I tried to blame all that on the death of my soulmate but I am taking responsibility now. The first few months being in here, I blamed everything on a woman named Kennedy. I plotted and schemed and blew a lot of money to try to end her. The thing is she caught on before anything could happen to her. She has been the only one to visit me. She was the one to get me arrested. I used to blame her for my situation. I don’t anymore. I’ve made my bed and now I must sleep above some other dude.

At first they had to handcuff me because you know me, manners   died when I was made. I would hit a woman. After a while of her just being there every week, no matter what I said or did (I spit on her), she kept coming back. She would tell me what was going on in the world. She told me her life story. To be honest she really got under my skin. It was like your mother was speaking to me through this woman. The old me would take credit for this letter but it really wasn’t my idea. Kennedy said I needed to right everyone/thing I had wronged. This is the start. I don’t blame you if you never forgive me. I am a horrible person. And even if you never read this, it will be out in the world. 

Georgia, please forgive me.